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Monday, Jul. 14, 2003 - 8:28 p.m.

Does my alley garden bed have a bull�s-eye on it? What the fuck?�..

For the second year in a row, someone working for one of my neighbors (behind my house) has fucked up my small garden bed in the alley.

Last year, it was a backhoe operator who was digging a new water line for the people who live behind me. He did try to save some of my garlic crop (it was winter at the time, and garlic was the only thing �growing� in the bed ) by picking up a section of frozen soil, doing his work, and then moving said frozen soil(containing my garlic) back into place. I lost some of the bulbs, but it wasn�t too big a deal.

Today?

I came home from work, opened the back door to let the dogs out, and looked down in the alley just in time to see a large truck and wood chipper backing down the alley. Only problem was, the driver didn�t know how to back a large truck with trailer up properly.

He kept jackknifing the trailer, and then pulling forward a little bit to straighten everything out again.

Fine, until he reached my 2 � foot wide, up against my fence, plenty of room for a large truck to get by without reaching it, bed against the back fence.

For some unexplainable reason, he just kept driving his truck (once he jackknifed his trailer) when he reached my bed. The back tires on his truck took out my entire crop of sunflower plants (�Moulin Rouge� and �Sunray� varieties) one at a time. I swear, it looked just like a corn picker, taking down one plant after another.

I yelled at the top of my lungs �Stop! You�re in my garden!� about the time the last plant fell. The old man who was �helping� him spot the trailer while he was backing up came running around to my side of the truck (dumbass was on the wide side of the alley, not the crowded one for some reason), and realized what the driver had done. He managed to get the driver stopped, and had him pull forward.

Too late.

Damage done.

He also smashed part of my lettuce that was close to maturing, and a few volunteer cleome flowers, too.

This pissed me off, but not as much as the realization that these were the idiots who had shoveled all of the burn pile crap in the alley onto my compost pile last Friday.

Oh yeah- I forgot to mention that little fucking mess here in my �journal�, didn�t I?

I noticed that the �burn piles� (in ��, because we can�t burn anything here in Mohall anymore, unless you call up and say you are having a �weenie roast�, which I planned on doing this fall to rid myself of all of the neighbor�s yard waste deposited behind my house�stop rambling Roadiepig) that sit between my neighbor and my house, and the one that sits up the alley a few more houses had been removed. At first, I thought, �Great! I won�t have to deal with them this year!�

Then, I noticed that my compost was covered up with what had once been the two �burn piles�. The mess is at least 3 feet deep over the top of my compost! I couldn�t figure out who would do such a fucked up thing to me.

I planned on waiting for the first cool day to pitchfork the mess into the back of my Hillbilly truck, and haul it off to Mikey�s house (where he CAN burn yard waste).

Then, when I saw who was in the alley, I figured it out: the tree cutting service had stopped by Friday, and cleared the alley so they could back their truck into my sunflowers.

I asked the old man (well, maybe I didn�t ask, I YELLED AT HIM!) if he was the one who moved all of the yard waste into my compost pile. He said, �Yeah, but I just rolled it over in into your waste pile. I didn�t think you would mind�.

I politely told him that he had moved EVERYONE ELSE�S YARD WASTE into my ACTIVE COMPOST PILE, and I didn�t appreciate it one bit.

He apologized, and said that he would move it back into the old burn spot when they finished. He also said he was sorry that they had run into my garden.

I had other things to do (lawn mowing and weedeater opperating were next on my list), but I didn�t want to let him off that easily. I told him,� You know, you work for the company that did my tree cutting this spring. I told anyone who asked what a great job you did. Hell, your boss�s sign is still in my front yard, 4 months later! And this is how you pay me back? Thanks a lot!�

I left him standing at the fence, mouth dropped to the ground. I think he had no idea that the company he worked for had done work for me this spring.

He called back to me, � Hey, let me make this right with you. How about we chip up and remove all of the stuff I threw onto you compost, and any other loose brush you have that laying around? We don�t want to leave with you angry at our company.�

�Fine�, I said. �Just don�t chip any of the logs. I still plan on splitting them when it gets colder this fall�.

They didn�t finish the tree they were there to remove, so they left the chipper in the alley. All I can say is when I get home tomorrow, the area behind my fence better look they way he promised, or the owner of the tree cutting service will get a phone call from me that he doesn�t want to receive�.


So, I guess that is about the best I can expect. I have the strong feeling that if I hadn�t been home, the damage would have went unreported. I would have had to track down who had been back in the alley (not hard to see where they did the work, two houses west of us), and then done what I could to prove that the damage had been done by their guys.

Good thing I was outside at the right time, I guess��


I did bring the one sunflower that was blooming inside for Lease. It was an almost black shade of red (Hence the name �Moulin Rouge�)

I would post a photo of it for you, but it has already wilted.

I guess they weren�t bred for use as cut flowers.

Or maybe it�s wilting from the shock of being run over by a large, heavy truck ���

Antique - Futuristic


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