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Wednesday, Mar. 14, 2007 - 8:23 p.m.

How a fool "rakes" his leaves, parts 1 and 2....

How a fool "rakes" his leaves, part 1:

Fire up the old leaf blower. In March, approximately 5 months after the leaves fall to the ground.

Spend 1 1/2 hours methodically pushing you now-composted leaves across your front yard and into the middle of the street.

Did I mention that you will be doing this for 1 and 1/2 freakin' hours? Not one minute less?

Leave them in a nice, straight row, so that passing motorist slow down and shake their heads at you as they pass to show you how stoopid they think you are for thinking you leaves would magically disappear if you did this with them.

How a fool "rakes" his leaves, part 2:

After having several people slow down and give you dirty looks or honk their horns at you, decide maybe there is a better way to clean up leaves.

Spend another 1/2 hour slowly pushing this mess to the left in this picture, piling all of it up against the next door neighbor's curb.

It was too dark once he finished for me to capture that image. That is why both of these photos are blurry, btw.

But I kid you not- he just left a spot the size of a Mini Cooper of rotting vegetation in front of his next door neighbor's house.

This rocket scientist has moved in with the "Christmas tree stays up all year round" lady across the street from us. He has 3 older pick-up trucks, and between them there might be 3/4ths of a muffler. He used them to plow parking lots and driveways during the blizzard last month, but couldn't figure out how to park close enough to the curb so that we could back out of our driveway easily for a week.

How do we keep getting these life's lottery losers in our block? I swear, there are probably 30 houses on our 2-block wide section of this road, and we have the only 3 houses with "Neighbors from Hell", moving in and out, withing a rock's throw of my front porch.

One last thing- the house he left the crap sitting at the curb? The single woman who lives there doesn't take any crap from anyone, so I think Jethro just made a big mistake.

I will bet you here right now that she will shovel that mess up , put it into her wheelbarrow, and deposit it on Christmas Tree all year woman's front porch before I come home from work tomorrow.

This could get interesting....

Antique - Futuristic


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